A blended family combines children from past relationships under the leadership of a stepdad. No one really prepares you for the role of a stepparent until the opportunity presents itself and you have to step up and be counted as the stepdad. Parenting in and by itself is quite difficult, add to it the role of a stepparent and you understand why support for stepdads is very important today more than ever before. Another thing to remember is that you are perfectly human and very normal when you are engulfed with feelings of being a step behind always.
Even so, there are steps you can take to become the best stepfather that every child would want to have. To get you started, it is advisable you seek support for stepdads to keep your emotional stability in check and ensure you are never disconnected from the kids at any given time. This way, you will be strong enough to take your leadership position as the head of that blended family and will assume your responsibilities with confidence even when the going gets tough.
There are very useful resources online that can offer the best advice for stepdads. Find a supportive website and join a forum of likeminded stepdads wanting to better their fathering abilities. The following are some additional action points you will find indispensable as a stepdad at this time and age.
First and foremost, it is important you understand and comprehend the emotional climate of your step kids. For instance, being aware of the kid’s hurts and wounds from past losses is key to coping with the sometimes oppositional or angry attributes of most children in blended families.
As a stepdad, you must also learn to understand earning respect and your leadership position in a blended family isn’t automatic and that it comes with time. What this means is that over time you will earn the right to be the leader of the blended family and you will automatically get to connect and nurture trust from the step kids. You must allow your step kids to accept you into their lives gradually not necessarily by forcing your way into their lives when you want to. It is also important that you be approachable and not defensive as you seek to become the leader in your new blended family. You shouldn’t be the one to easily get hurt by the common reactions of most stepchildren. More importantly, you must learn to manage your anger and stress, so you don’t end up taking it all out on the kids.